Overthinking

I’ve been told by friends or people close to me that I think too much. I do not deny this as I do tend to overthink about things/ problems/ people and even scenarios. The last 2 – 3 years with the pandemic, it has also caused me to withdraw into a little hole. It was overwhelmed greatly not just living with the pandemic but dealing with relationships that come along with it, navigating them and threading on sometimes thin ice how people feel about me.

The first year of the pandemic, alcohol was featured mostly in our daily lives as we wondered how best to survive. In the second year of the pandemic, I sought to healthier measures to dealing with my life. I first turned to exercise as a form of filling my time after dropping the kid in school. Then as I started to enjoy the workout, I tried out other forms of workout to challenge myself further. While I didn’t lose a lot of weight, I felt that the endorphins released during the workout made me happy. It also challenged me to remain discipline and also stick to a regime where I chose to shut down at about 10pm to head to bed. The workouts also made me tired physically and I felt that I didn’t have bandwidth to think about other things.

I’m generally quite a sentimental person valuing friendships and relationships. But people move on, people can change, perhaps I have changed as well – my values are different and my priorities have changed. I realised that social media is not a pleasant environment for me as it made me compare about the lifestyle I have vs others. I realised this is not a healthy habit that I want to continue to hold so I am now mindfully doing what I can to cut back on the use of social media and the mindless scrolling of envying what others have vs what I don’t have.

It is still a long road for me and I feel I now have social anxiety but I hope as time goes pass, I am able to conquer my challenges and feel better about myself as a person.

Baby steps.. one day at a time…

Primary 1

A reminder that time really just flies by. Thankfully, we survived Primary 1 despite all the COVID-19 restrictions in place. One thing I was a little sad for the Bub was that she didn’t get an elder buddy when she started her P1 and I wasn’t able to go into school to witness her buying food in the canteen like what other parents did the years before COVID. But it’s nice to see her thriving well in school and really surviving P1.

2022

I’m still here! Nearly 3 years on after the COVID-19 pandemic, here we are.. still living in a pandemic stated of mind.

The world has changed and so have I. Social media has transformed the way I’ve shared things and also viewed things. But I’m trying to keep it together, to share things that are meaningful to me and to be authentic to my own feelings.

I was contemplating whether I should be writing more here. It’s been on my mind for a while but I just didn’t feel the hurry to start until I received an email asking for a collab. I was rather amazed that my blog was picked up! Instagram is much snazzier and a lot faster for most businesses these days. I felt a little touched to even be considered so that kinda reignited my desire to write.

I look forward to kick-starting my engine for writing / sharing more on this platform. Perhaps starting with the recent holiday that we took last December. Stick around and let’s see how it goes!

Thoughts

I have been ruminating a lot. Probably I just feel a whole lot emotional this period and thoughts have just crept up.

I’ve been thinking on going on an Instagram fast and get the need “to check on what others are doing” out of my system. I’m only human and comparing what others have against my life isn’t doing me all that good. I know that my life isn’t all that bad and I feel blessed in many ways.. so this is a change that I am taking to count my blessings.

Pampered

Received a little care package from the brand which made me really excited. Well, who wouldn’t since we are basically all stuck indoors these days.

No big gestures for I guess I still have a long way to go in hitting that kind of quota but these aromatherapy blends definitely would come in handy in calming and lifting one’s spirits during these times.

Happy Mother’s Day

Broaching the subject of Mother’s Day with the Man can be quite scary. The other day, I casually mentioned that I had purchased some gifts for my Mom, sisters and some close Mommy friends for the upcoming occasion. As we can’t go out to celebrate the occasion, I hope that these presents would send some cheer along the way. The Man got agitated and said to me, “Well, if you are expecting anything from me, you are not getting any. You are not my mother and while the occasion honors mothers, it’s something the kid should do and not me.”

KILL JOY.

I mean, I was just sharing with him something that I did. I wasn’t expecting him to do anything. It would be nice but I know that it isn’t his nature and I wasn’t telling him all this to arm-twist him into throwing something fancy for me. I was just making conversation after a day’s of work and staying indoors.

OH WELL.

So I wasn’t expecting anything to be honest. My social media feed was filled with happy images of mommy friends with floral bouquets, gifts and meals lavished on them. While I secretly hoped that I would receive the same treatment. I know the time was not now for the Man has been under immense stress as well. Another place, another time then.

It was sufficient that the baby girl made me a card and showered me with unlimited kisses during the day. The Man and I played tag team to whip up a fancier than usual meal using caviar. I guess I didn’t want to draw too much attention to the occasion, I mean what’s the point of ruffling up his feathers?

But somewhere during the day, we did receive flowers for both me and the MIL! Presented by the kid who beamed and announced that she specially chose the flowers for us.

Truly my sweetheart!

Thanks to the Man for the lovely flowers! Next time don’t be so grumpy when I am just sharing about my day can. I mean, why ruin the feels? Thank you for all you have done!

Also, I thought if no one is going to make me happy on the ocassion to celebrate Mums, the least I could do is to make myself happy. So I went out and purchased this Coconut pudding from Soicco and it was absolutely divine. I finished 3 out of the 5 tubs on my own. Ain’t sharing with no one.

Getting through the Circuit Breaker

I lost count on the number of bottles of wine that we have drunk during the Circuit Breaker. I guess I will probably emerge as some kind of alcoholic after this whole 2 month stay home period but good food and wine, probably is one of the things that keep us sane.

The Man managed to get his hands on some caviar and he went all the way out with adding caviar on almost everything that it would potentially taste good on. So for breakfast one day, we had creamy scrambled eggs with caviar on a sourdough toast.

For our tea-break, we had blue pea pancakes with hard boiled eggs topped with caviar (of course).

Another variation of caviar with potato.

According to the Man, there are like 20 different dishes to try with caviar. Let’s see how this goes. I fear for my chloestrol levels after this period.